The Story Of Lucy And Jessie

[PHYLLIS]
Here's a little story that should make you cry
About two unhappy dames
Let us call them Lucy "X" and Jessie "Y"
Which are not their real names.

Now Lucy has the purity
Along with the unsurety
That comes with being only twenty-one.

Jessie has maturity
And plenty of security
Whatever you can do with them she's done.

Given their advantages
You may ask why
The two ladies have such grief
This is my belief
In brief:

Lucy is juicy
But terribly drab
Jessie is dressy
But cold as a slab
Lucy wants to be dressy
Jessie wants to be juicy
Lucy wants to be Jessie
And Jessie Lucy
You see Jessie is racy
But hard as a rock.

Lucy is lacy
But dull as a smock
Jessie wants to be lacy
Lucy wants to be Jessie
That's the sorrowful pr?cis
It's very messy
Poor sad souls
Itching to be switching roles
Lucy wants to do what Jessie does
Jessie want: to be what Lucy was.

[CHORUS]
Now if you see Lucy "X"
Youthful truthful Lucy "X"
Let her know she's better than she suspects
Now if you see Jessie "Y"
Faded jaded Jessie "Y"
Tell her that she's sweller than apple pie
Juicy Lucy
Dressy Jessie
Juicy Lucy
Dressy Jessie.

[PHYLLIS]
Lucy's a lassie
You pat on the head
Jessie is classy
But virtually dead
Lucy wants to be classy
Jessie wants to be Lassie
If Lucy and Jessie could only combine
I could tell you someone
Who would finally feel just fine!

[CHORUS] Juicy Lucy

[PHYLLIS] Just fine!

[CHORUS] Dressy Jessie

[PHYLLIS] Just fine!

[CHORUS] Juicy Lucy

[PHYLLIS] Just fine!

[CHORUS] Dressy Jessie

[ALL:
Tell 'em that they ought to get together quick
'Cause getting it together is the whole trick!

[PHYLLIS] Yeah!